What I Look for in a Submissive Male

I love submissive men. I have had the pleasure of being served by men from around the world, of all backgrounds and age groups, and I feel immensely excited whenever I receive a letter from a new sub. In My ever elitist opinion, I consider My subs to be the cream of the crop (pun intended!). They are all exceptionally well behaved, polite to a fault, fiercely intelligent, well educated, successful and driven, and they all live to please and serve a worthy Woman. 

Do you think you have what it takes to serve Me?


The most important trait I look for in a submissive is the right attitude. Submissive men know their place in respect to Me, and from this place of subordination they will behave and speak in a way that reinforces their inferior status. Submission is a self-proclaimed way of thinking framed by humbleness, respect and admiration for the Alpha (Me), a genuine desire to serve and worship, and the need to devote one's energy and time to something greater than one's selfish interests. To serve is to give the GIFT OF SUBMISSION -- "my time to be used at YOUR disposable, my body to be used for YOUR pleasure, my life for YOUR life". This is not to be taken lightly by a Dominant. (Click here to gain a deeper understanding of submission)

For Me, submission is not confined to a dungeon or a "scene". Submission begins in the mind, and you will show it the moment you decide to send Me a formal request to see Me in a session. This is keenly felt in the way you write to Me, the way you speak to Me, and the way you present yourself in person. your degree of attentiveness to details is a reflection of the pride you take in yourself as a worthy sub, and your respect for the Mistress you serve. you perform well for Me because I am worth it, and because you believe yourself to be worthy of Me. you make the effort to serve Me in the best way possible, and you aim to please Me because My happiness is your priority (DO NOT mistake the desire to "please" with the desire to "impress", the latter of which I disdain and will send you back to school).

My subs understand that service is service. They know that there is absolutely NO difference between lying down to take a beating from Me, and polishing My boots or carrying out any other mundane chore I give them. you either serve Me fully, with everything you have to give, or you do not.

Submissive men see Women as superior to them, but they are also selective about which Women they serve. They look for Dominance in a female, and they are turned on by a Woman who is comfortable assuming the leadership role. While communication is an essential component to any D/s relationship, they want a Woman who intuitively understands the roots of their submissive desires without having to spell out everything for Her, and they will know right away if she is a true Dominant or a fake.

The submissive way of thinking elevates you to a higher type of human being than most.


Due to the fact that submission is a cerebral pursuit that requires one to understand the subtleties and nuances of etiquette, ritual, and timeless values rooted in chivalry, I look for intelligence and education when interviewing new subs. Some basic questions that I ask Myself when speaking to a new sub are "Is he well-spoken?", "Does he understand underlying meanings and messages...or do I need to spell everything out for him?", "Does he want to serve a Mistress...or does he just want to satisfy his fetishes and be done with?", and more. I can gather all the 'necessary data' within 5 minutes of speaking to a new sub -- this is why you must make an excellent first impression!

How do I measure intelligence and education? Intelligence is characterized by the capacity to understand and apply new concepts, draw connections, and recognize patterns -- all easy to discern when I speak to you.  I measure a sub's level of education NOT by your diploma nor the place where you obtained your diploma, but by your range of knowledge, wisdom, and insight into the world in which you live. It is not possible to know and understand everything.  Therefore, what I really look for is how well you organize your thoughts in a rational manner, how you process what I say to you, and whether or not you file away important details for future opportunities. The intelligent submissive thinks on a multi-dimensional level.


The last trait I look for in a sub is a self-actualized sense of confidence and modesty. I consider MOST of My subs to be alpha males. Many of them work in upper-management positions in their company, some own their own company or a conglomerate of companies, while others are completing their formal education in rigorous programs.  They have achieved their success through hard work, strategy and game theory, innovation, and leadership. A degree of congenital confidence and boldness rest at the heart of their personalities. That they can out-think most of their peers is what sets them apart. On top of all this, to acknowledge and be confident enough to embrace their submissive selves gives them depth and it is this near-invisible depth that heightens the experience for Me when I dominate them. To know what you are capable of accomplishing AND to humble yourself in the presence of a Woman is a form of gracefulness sprung from maturity and introspection. My subs understand that to serve is to drown out the millions of thoughts swimming in your head and slip into a headspace that is both finite and limitless, dictated by Me. Therein lies your freedom from yourself.

The combination of confidence, intelligence, humility, and subservience in a man fascinates and stimulates Me.

It is a testament to the vastness and beauty of the mind, the real target of BDSM.

Now that you know what I look for in a submissive, you may send Me an email. No pressure...