The Psychology of Financial Domination

Financial Domination is that rare BDSM fantasy that, from the outside world of “vanilla heteronormativity”, is baffling to the mind; and from the point of view of the professional dominatrix, too good to be true. Throughout the years I have trained 'money slaves' of various breeds and it is only now that I feel I am experienced enough to deconstruct for you the mind of a financial submissive. 

What is financial domination (FinDom)? First, I will clarify what is NOT financial domination: it is NOT an unethical exploitation of a male sub, it is NOT an easy way for women to advertise online as financial dominatrices as a get-rich-quick scheme by using men, it is NOT a woman who makes a career out of asking men to subsidize all her living expenses, it is NOT woman who only wants to be spoiled with money or gifts -- and nothing else -- from men (a financial dominatrix is not to be confused with a 'sugar baby'). A woman who falsely poses as a findom Mistress because she needs the money possesses zero power in this game. 

My definition is as follows: Financial Domination is a sexually arousing GAME of power-play whereby psychological pleasure is experienced as a result of the humiliation from giving up one's monetary assets to another. The FinDom fantasy exists in predominantly MALE subs (there is very little evidence to suggest that women enjoy this type of power play). A financial dominatrix enjoys this game for the thrill of humiliating her money-slave, she does not need the money and she will say "no" to whomever displeases her--therein lies her power. There are 3 main reason why some subs enjoy financial domination: control, humiliation, and service. 

Financial Domination is able to exist and (actually become a fetish or desire for some) because of certain Universal Rules of Life (UROL) for men, unchanged by feminism:

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Interview with a Conscious Submissive Male

I had the pleasure and privilege of engaging in a most stimulating discussion with Paltego, the owner and operator of Femdom-Resource, an exceptionally informative website celebrating one intelligent man's journey in submission and his appreciation for the beauty and art of female domination. His is one of the best male-sub blogs online and I encourage all of you--tops and bottoms alike--to visit his domain. Clearly a labor of love (and hormones!), Femdom-Resource also houses a well-curated collection of Femdom art, photography, videos, erotic fiction, and more. A source for quality Femdom/male-sub content, Paltego created a platform from which to engage with kinksters and promote his favorite Mistresses and their blogs (I was humbled to find My "Mind of the Mistress" page on his list). 

Paltego was kind enough to grant Me a written interview detailing his experiences as a sub, his analysis on the submissive mindset, and his experiences with some of the most preeminent professional Mistresses in the country. Our exchange was illuminating and thought-provoking, and I was moved to reexamine My own FemDom philosophy and how I present Myself to the world. 

With Paltego's expressed permission, below are the insights and musings of a thinking, rational, and hopelessly submissive man (My favorite kind!):

1) How did you come to develop your submissive identity? And around what age?

Getting my current identity was a lengthy process. I grew up in a tiny English village in the 80’s, when the internet was still an academic/military curiosity. We didn’t even have a TV for a lot of my childhood, so it was very different to the information saturation we have today.

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The Benefits of Male Chastity

Chastity Training is a fine art in the realm of Dominance and submission. The ability to control a man's primal urges for frequent sexual release poses as one of the more challenging disciplines of the Mistress and slave dynamic. A central focal point of his daily rhythm and distraction, the very thought of handing the keys of his virile vehicle over to a Mistress can be downright terrifying. The notion that a Woman should dictate the timing of his orgasms as well as when he may even have skin contact with his main member is not for the slave who merely wishes to dabble and dally. For most men, their modus operanti is the lifelong reliance upon self-gratification that often takes on the form of compulsive, less-than-satisfying, linear starts to finishes. 

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A Tribute to My Fellow Kinky Folk

After more than half a decade of training slaves from many corners of the globe, My journey into Mistressdom would not have been possible without the bold, passionate, and talented women I have met along the way. Each of the following Dominatrices/BDSM educators have contributed to My knowledge of BDSM with their guidance, friendship, and compassion. Some of them have been living this lifestyle for decades, devoting their life to their craft and educating others on the art of kink. Some have even been kind enough to invite Me into their immaculately appointed playspaces, allowing Me to use their facilities and inspiring Me to design My own one day. If you ever find yourself in any one of their territories, do reach out to them for training, discipline, and education. 

-CALIFORNIA

San Diego: Mistress Porcelain Midnight  

Los Angeles: Mistress Nicolette, Mistress Lucy Khan, Ms. Kaila Yi, Mistress Lexine

San Francisco: Mistress Morgana, Midori, Domina Yuki, Domina Colette

-NEW HAMPSHIRE

Mistress Molly

-NEW YORK

Mistress Lucy Sweetkill and Mistress Dia Dynasty of La Maison du RougeMistress Ariana, MarcusLikesIt, Yin Q  

-WASHINGTON DC

 Mistress Tyler, Mistress Evelyn 

-CANADA

Toronto: Lady Azelle

-LONDON, UK

Goddess Maya Liyer